“Be still and know that I am God.”
I had my third chemo treatment on Friday and as I was mentally preparing myself, knowing what the next 10 days or so would be like, what kept running through my head was to “Be still and know that I am God.”
I remembered my sister Sara writing about what that phrase meant to her…and she nailed what I was feeling too. Her words were this…
“I wondered what He really meant by that for me. Because the “know that I am God” part totally changes the “be still” part for me.
I think in my world He’s not telling me to slow down. I’m already at a standstill. I think He’s telling me to let go. To let go of trying to be something I can’t be. To let go of the idea that I can do anything about any of this.
I think He’s telling me it’s ok to be still in situations because I’m not Him.
He’s God and I’m not and so my job, while I hate the stillness and fight the stillness that is created because the pain in my body is anything but still, is simply to let it go.
To be still and let God be God and go with the flow.
Because he’s God and I’m not.”
After chemo treatments, I don’t have a choice but to be still…just as Sara was explaining. I am exhausted, in pain and simply can’t do much of anything. So during my frustration of being still when there are so many things I want to do and want to be a part of, I too need to let go. Let go of what I can’t do in those moments. To let go of trying to do all those things my body is not prepared to help me do.
So once again, my sister is teaching what God wants from me. To remember that He is God and I am not. I must simply during those times, let go and go with the flow.
What do you think He is saying to you?